Rambling Rationalization

Vickie and I had a wonderful dinner last Sunday with long-time friends Steve and Kathy. Delicious food. I broke the two martini rule. It's more of a guideline, really. As they fellow citizens of Patriots Nation, we naturally spent a good amount of time in alcohol-fueled discussions of Deflategate. We all agreed with Steve that saying Roger Goodell's name is like a game of Marco Polo, only instead of "Polo" the correct response is "Fuck that guy."

We can never forgive the man who, for reasons that can only be described as petty, spiteful, self-aggrandizing, venal, vile, villainous, arbitrary, feckless and despicable, did everything in his power to destroy the reputation of Tom Brady.

Fuck that guy.

Wonderland

"…it is still amazing to me that Goodell has presided over a situation that has irreparably damaged the legacy and reputation of one of the greatest quarterbacks and ambassadors in the history of the game, relying on the anything-but-definitive Wells report in doing so, while failing to take any accountability from a league perspective for creating a swirling mess."

-Mike Reiss

I like "swirling mess." It conjures up the image of an overflowing toilet.

Taking No Pigskin Prisoners

Deflategate is already in Bill Belichick's rear view. Tom Brady hasn't missed a workout while dealing with his appeal. It may be true that no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills but it's clear that nobody compartmentalizes off the field distractions like the Patriots.

This is starting to remind me of 2007. I guess the big question is, who's the Randy Moss of 2015?

It's Just A Game, Isn't It?

It seems that most of Patriots Nation was willing to die on Deflategate Hill and they're wicked pissed Robert Kraft gave the order to stand down.

Everything is Forever

That's it, I guess. Nothing left but to own it.

Pigskin Life As We Are Generally Aware Of It

Aaron Dobson's hamstring? Anyone?

Unintended Consequences

With Roger Goodell naming himself as the fair and impartial arbiter for Tom Brady's appeal, my early optimism regarding Brady playing all 16 regular season games has shouted "Abracadabra!", thrown a flash bomb at its feet and vanished through a trap door, center stage.

PSI DGAF

Sorry, I wasn't paying attention. Did the groundhog really predict three more months of Deflategate? That seems cruel, even by rodent standards.

Guilty by Proxy

So, let me get this straight. The New England Patriots are guilty because Spygate. And Tom Brady is guilty because he's an arrogant prick.

Okay…

The Tyranny of Cowards

After more than a week of reading various pieces deconstructing, ridiculing and metaphorically shredding the Wells Report on Deflategate, I have to say, I didn't see this coming.

We're not done, yet, of course. My understanding is that the Patriots cannot appeal the fine or the loss of draft picks but Tom Brady will appeal his suspension.

Infamy

"We're mad scientists, monsters. You've got to own it."

-      Tony Stark, "Avengers: Age of Ultron"

Why did this remind me of Bill Belichick, Tom Brady and the Patriots? I wonder…

Feeling Deflated

I don't think there's anything I could add to Robert Kraft's statement, so I'll leave it at that.

Well, there is this, I suppose.

And so begins my two week media blackout.

See you May 21st.

All Apologies

"The Patriots have so far gone undisciplined for their role in Deflategate…"

-      from BleacherReport's Deflategate Investigation: Latest Details, Comments, Reaction

For people who use words for a living, going with "so far gone undisciplined" instead of "yet to be found guilty of wrongdoing" tells me everything I need to know about their not-so-hidden agenda.

I'm Looking At You

Despite the usual Belichickian flourishes, the consensus amongst the gridiron cognoscenti is that New England put together a solid 2015 draft class. Undrafted free agents have been signed and while anything can happen in this crazy world, I think what you see today is pretty much what we'll see in September.

Thinking About The Future By Looking At What Happened Yesterday

When all was said and done, it was a classic Bill Belichick draft.

We Can Only Guess What Happens Next

It wouldn't be the NFL draft without Bill Belichick doing something that makes Mel Kiper, Jr.'s hair catch on fire. Not literally, of course.

What The What?

What just happened? Did the Patriots just pick a Top 15 talent at #32? 

By 11:00pm, it seemed a who's who of players linked to the Patriots were off the board. The much mocked Florida State offensive lineman Cameron Erving had been drafted by the Cleveland Browns at #19 and secret object of desire WR Nelson Agholor was taken with the very next pick by the Philadelphia Eagles. 

Both were long shots to make it to #32, anyway. 

Hybrid SS/LB Shaq Thompson, who I'd seen mocked to the Patriots at #64, was selected by the Carolina Panthers at #25. Maybe Thompson is the next Troy Polamalu? 

The Dallas Cowboys took super-freak CB Byron Jones at #27 (he reminded me too much of Ras-I Dowling, anyway) and the Detroit Lions took OG Laken Tomlinson at #28 (after trading down, I think). The Patriots were supposed to trade down from #32 to take Tomlinson somewhere in the top half of the 2nd round and the Lions were supposed to take a DT to fill the gaping Ndamukong Suh-sized hole in their defensive line so you'd have to call the Tomlinson pick something of a surprise.

Speaking of surprises...

Malcom Brown? Malcom Brown.

When do the Patriots announce they've re-signed Dan Connolly?