I
spent fifteen minutes today reading comments on this Pro Football Talk
post
about cheating. For amusement purposes, only. The trolls that popped out from
under their bridges, flinging their noisome feces at the Patriots (and the
author) did not disappoint. I felt sorry for some of them, their aim was so
poor.
Unlike
Tom Brady!
Thank
you, thank you. I’ll be here all week. Try the veal and don’t forget to tip
your waitress!
Let
me be clear. I don’t think two wrongs make a right. You can debate whether or
not manipulating the salary cap or piping in crowd noise or a GM texting
coaches during the game or a player snorting coke and switching urine samples
or defensive players faking injuries to slow down the opponents offense or wide
receivers spraying a little stick ‘em on their gloves or throwing some
money in a pot and paying whoever knocks out the opposing quarterback or
letting some air out of a football is more of an affront to the spirit of fair
play. Some sins are greater than others, of course, but you can’t justify one
with another.
This
is easy for me to say. There is still no proof that my team cheated (if
anything, I grow more suspicious by
the minute of the Colts when it comes to Deflategate). Spygate? Yeah, that
happened. Seven years ago. You may have noticed the Patriots have actually won
more since Spygate than they did before. So. What else have you got?
Roger
Goodell isn’t going to be the only one who will owe an apology if the Patriots
are exonerated by the Wells investigation. That would put the jimmies on the
Patriots’ Super Bowl sundae. The Colts being found out to have tampered with
the ball D’Qwell Jackson intercepted ball would be the cherry on top.
Would you like to look into the camera and say I’m sorry?
Full
disclosure: I don’t expect any apologies. Goodell has already said that he’s
just doing his job, protecting the shield, ensuring the integrity of the game
and the validity of point spreads. I do expect numerous pigskin pundits and
bobbleheads to author pieces explaining why they don’t owe the Patriots or
Robert Kraft or Bill Belichick or Tom Brady an apology, either. That should
make for entertaining reading. I expect to see a lot of “after Spygate” justifications.
G.O.A.T.
Is
it a more reasonable explanation – than underinflated footballs – that Bill
Belichick and Tom Brady are the simply the best better than all the rest Head
Coach/Quarterback combo in NFL history?
Belichick
and Brady have just led the youngest team to ever win the Super Bowl to
victory. What if they can run off another three out of four? I mean, 38 is the
new 28, am I right? If anyone can play – at a high level – till he’s 40, Tom
Brady looked like that guy last Sunday.
Just
give me a minute here. I’m just thinking about, you know, that actually happening.
Can you imagine? Six Super Bowl wins in eight tries over seventeen years. What
if Brady wins the Super Bowl when he’s 40 years old? I hope that doesn’t play
out like SB49. Three years from now I’ll be all teed up for my first heart
attack. Could a blowout win in the Super Bowl be too much to ask?
Of
course, I’d be happy with just one more Lombardi Trophy, blowout or otherwise.
And yes, I recognize that even one more is exceedingly greedy. And no, I don’t
care.
Sure,
the critics will throw Spygate shade on Bill Belichick, even if he pockets
another Lombardi Trophy. It’s not like he’s made a lot of friends in the media.
You know, the people who vote on who gets into the Hall of Fame, most of whom
I’m thinking have received either the death glare (just blink and let him punch
you in the arm already) or been told to commit a physically impossible sexual
act with themselves. So, that’s a thing, I guess.
If
you’re still thinking Belichick should’ve called a timeout to save time for
Brady instead of relying on his defense to stop the Seahawks, check out this
piece on goal-line
stands (spoiler alert: the Patriots are really good at situational
football) and this post with Rob Ninkovich commenting on how the Patriots prepared
for that moment.
The
“dink and dunk” criticism of Brady resurfaced
this week, though that hardly seems like something that will keep him out of
Canton. Still, I’ve always been curious about this. He looked pretty good
throwing the long ball to Randy Moss back in the day. Not so much lately, of
course, and not so much in his early career, either. Anyway, so what. The TD
pass to Gronk in the Super Bowl was pretty sweet, not to mention the
game-winner to Brandon LaFell against the Ravens.
Plus,
you know, four rings.
Well,
okay. There’s this,
too.
Stay Classy… Everyone, I guess.
So,
the Patriots are getting called out for taking a few shots at the Seahawks from
the duck boats. The completely out of control Julian Incredelman dissed a
poster of Richard Sherman and LeGarrette Blount was rocking a “Bitch Mode”
t-shirt.
Okay.
You’ve got to know the room and those jokes just killed it on Boylston Street.
On
the other hand, I can see how it might offend the delicate sensibilities of the
good sportsmanship league.
Admittedly,
going after Marshawn Lynch is something of an odd choice. And “Bitch-Mode?” I
think I might’ve gone with “Least-Mode” or “Brady-Mode.”
What
was that picture of Richard Sherman that Jules was mocking so shamelessly? It
was a picture of him from that sideline shot of him holding up two and then four fingers and pointing at the
scoreboard and making the touchdown signal? That was just good clean fun,
right? A great lesson in sportsmanship for the impressionable youth of America.
Richard Sherman such a delight!
And
throwing punches at the end of the game was nothing but class.
Look,
to all the pundits and bobbleheads who said the Patriots should just stick to
celebrating their team and the win and leave the other guys out of it, all I
can say is, have your own fucking parade. Okay? After you spent the last two
weeks vilifying the Patriots as cheaters, calling Tom Brady a liar, saying they
should forfeit their spot in the Super Bowl, that Belichick should be suspended
for a season and the Patriots should be fined and lose draft picks and their
Super Bowl wins should have asterisks next to them and still you continue to give the
haters an open mic
without any proof anyone employed by the Patriots tampered with game balls?
After you acted all butt-hurt when Russell Wilson’s coronation was cancelled?
It must’ve been the worst play call in the history of forever for the Patriots
to steal the Lombardi Trophy from the
Seahawks. What was Pete thinking? Why, God? Why? Why? Why?!?!?!?
You
were all openly rooting for the Seahawks and now you want to tell the Patriots and
their fans how to party?
Maybe
LeGarrette Blount had it right with that Bitch-Mode t-shirt after all.
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