Monday, November 12, 2012

I Know What Unacceptable Means


For those of us who were wondering, we now know everyone – including Norv Turner – knows the way the San Diego Chargers play football is unacceptable. Now that we have that out of the way, we can move on to assigning blame. I personally blame Tom Cruise for everything. I’m not sure what he had to do with this, but with this latest failure by the Chargers, isn’t it time something was done about Tom Cruise?

 
We may be no more certain about the Super Bowl matchup this fine November Monday than we were last week but we now seem to be in a position to pronounce time of death for a number of NFL franchises just 10 weeks into the season.

Thanks for playing…

Foregone Conclusions
The Carolina Panthers are now 2-7-0 and dead last in the NFC South, looking up at the resurgent Saints, the surprising Buccaneers and the Falcons, who still have the best record in the NFL (tied with the Texans) even after their loss to the Saints. The Panthers had a chance to make a statement on Sunday against the visiting Broncos and it turns out that statement was, “Yeah, we’re done.” The good news? Cam Newton will have seven more opportunities to practice being a grown up in his post-game press conferences.

It seems like the Browns, also 2-7-0, also in dead last in their division – the AFC North – with three 2011 playoff teams ahead of them, have been out of it for a decade. Why should 2012 be any different? Usually when teams “blow things up” it’s because their long tenured leadership team seems to have lost it. Salary cap constraints driven by questionable roster moves have left them with an aging roster lacking depth at key positions. Or the game has changed and they haven’t kept up. Or both. Think Indianapolis Colts. After a decade of excellence they suffer the Peyton Manning injury and fall to 2-12-0. They fire their GM, Head Coach and then make the change at quarterback with #1 pick Andrew Luck. The Browns blow the things up that they were already blowing up. No truth to the rumors the Browns will be featured in “Expendables III.”

It can get worse, though, as evidenced by the 1-8-0 Jacksonville Jaguars and the 1-7-0 (soon to be 1-8-0) Kansas City Chiefs. The Jaguars aren’t disappointing anyone but the most delusional of Jaguars’ fans but the Chiefs were a preseason pick by more than a few pigskin pundits and bobbleheads (including yours truly) to take the AFC West. The only mystery still surrounding the Jags is how they won a game in the first place. Come to think of it, how can we make sense of the Chiefs only victory, a road win over the Saints? Neither team believes they have their QB of the Future on the roster, their head coaches are better cast as coordinators and ownership has already flipped the safety guard off that large red self-destruct button.

You’ll Be Stone in a Week
Based on arithmetic, I’m hard-pressed to understand why the 3-6-0 Eagles and Skins are out of it but the 4-5-0 Cowboys still have a shot at the NFC East. Or maybe it’s just hard for me to imagine the Cowboys having a shot. Still, they are just one game behind the Giants, who are rapidly approaching terminal velocity. The Giants, in fact, have four imminently losable games left on their schedule; Packers, Saints, Falcons, Ravens. The Cowboys on the other hand, get their next three games at home – Browns, Skins, Eagles – before facing the inevitably heartbreaking stretch of Bengals, Steelers, Saints. The Skins, with 5 of their remaining 7 games and the Eagles, with 4 of their remaining 7 against the NFC East, would seemingly hold their fate in their own shaky hands. Could all four of these teams finish 9-7-0?

When Bad Things Happen to Good People it’s Not a Sign from Above, it’s Just a Small Data Sample
The Bills may have played their best game of the season on Sunday. Except for the 14 penalties and Ryan Fitzpatrick’s crushing, game-ending interception and the fact that they couldn’t take advantage of a rather desultory performance by the Patriots who came out of the bye week looking a little sleepy. The Bills aren’t just 3-6-0; they’re 0-3-0 in the division. They need to run the table while the Patriots drop 4 of 7. As do the Jets.

Could that happen? Well, yes. This is the NFL, after all. Of course, the Jets travel to Buffalo to close out the season so if it can happen it can only happen for one of those two teams.

What are the chances?

The Jets – aside from their leave it all on the field game at Foxborough – have scored 0, 17, 9, 9 and 7 points while giving up 34, 23, 35, 30 and 28 points. The NYJ have to hope it’s true that past performance is no indication of future results. Unfortunately for the Jets this is football and not mutual funds. Meanwhile, as bad as the locals think the Patriots defense is, the Bills defense is one standard deviation worse, giving up 400+ yards and 31+ points a game.

So, no, that isn’t going to happen.

Maybe the Dolphins are still in the rear view but the AFC East still runs through Foxborough.

Dick Moves
Earlier this season, Greg Schiano ordered his Buccaneers defense to blitz Eli Manning in the “victory formation.” Though hardly against the rules and the kind of call that sent a message to his team that he was going to coach the full 60 minutes and he expected them to play the full 60 minutes (and look where Tampa Bay is now), it’s the kind of play that works maybe once in a hundred tries and the consensus among pigskin pundits and bobbleheads was that it was kind of a dick move.

It looked like Schiano would win Dick Move of the Year for 2012 in a walk over until this past Sunday, when Ravens HC John Harbaugh ordered up a fake field goal with the score Baltimore 41, Oakland 17 and less than six minutes to go in the 3rd quarter. Had Harbaugh kicked the field goal the final score of the game would’ve been 51-20 instead of 55-20. Did Harbaugh have a side bet where he was giving 31 points? Anyway, this isn’t about running up the score. There’s really no such thing in the pros. You’re winning by 24 points with a 4th down on your opponent’s 7-yard line. You could go for it – give your opponent a chance to stop you straight up – or you can kick the field goal but a fake field goal? Yeah. Kind of a dick move.

I’ll Take Any Win
When the only thing that matters is Super Bowls, regular season wins can sometimes be taken for granted, can sometimes be disdained. Over the last few weeks, Tom Brady has tried to remind us that it’s tough winning in the NFL. Maybe so, the citizens of Patriots Nation think, but not for the New England Patriots of Bill Belichick and Tom Terrific. So, we look askance at the 37-31 home win over Buffalo. The defense seemed to take a step back. There were several dropped passes – one by Wes Welker that would definitely have been a touchdown. The Pats were simply underwhelming in almost every phase of the game.

Maybe that is the biggest positive we can take away from this game. Our pigskin heroes played badly enough to lose yet still came out on top.

They started the game without Aaron Hernandez and Patrick Chung and finished it without starting guards Logan Mankins and Dan Connolly and still won.

And the defense continues to create turnovers. Vince Wilfork came up with a strip sack recovered by Jermaine Cunningham. Much maligned DB Devin McCourty forced a fumble recovered by Kyle Arrington, stopping a scoring opportunity for the Bills and then came up with the game-ending INT in the End Zone. If there was any debate regarding McCourty’s move to safety I think that debate is over.

Stevan Ridley continues to impress, Danny Woodhead continues to amaze, Wes Welker continues to get open, Rob Gronkowski continues to spike and Tom Brady is still Tom Brady.

Can the Patriots play better? Certainly. I expect they will be.

Trying to do it right…


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