Return of the King

I’m just rolling around the internet, reliving the literally triumphant return of Tom Brady. Tom Terrific. The Blueprint. Perfect Tommy. Young Odin. The Icy Commander. The G.O.A.T.

If this is shaking off the rust, I can hardly wait till Brady gets loose.

Tense and Nervous

It hasn’t helped the collective pigskin psyche of Patriots Nation to see “Julian Edelman, foot” show up on the injury report. Or “LeGarrette Blount, hip.” Not to mention the rumors about Gronk’s balky hamstring. Who would’ve thought “Marcus Cannon, calf” would’ve been a cause for concern? Maybe after losing at home, getting shut out by a division rival coached by Rex Ryan, everything is a cause for concern.

Pigskin Perspective

I wasn’t always a Patriots fan. I was an Army brat and rooted for the New York Giants, the Denver Broncos and Buffalo Bills before I moved to New Hampshire to finish off an unnecessarily overwrought BA degree in English Literature. Naturally, I got a job in information technology by converting a work study position into a programming position. The rest is history, as they say.

Turning the Page

So...

...that's how that feels.

Maybe we need to be reminded of how that feeling feels every now and then.

Like once every 23 years.

Well...

We're on to Buffalo!

Everyone Gets Paid Back

The Patriots have announced Jimmy Garoppolo as the starting QB for this Sunday’s game against Buffalo Bills. You can go ahead and tick the box next to Toughness on Jimmy G’s curriculum vitae.

Okay, the game still needs to be played but assuming Garoppolo can be 80% of what he was in the first half of the Dolphins game, GMs in half the NFL’s franchises will start putting together back of the napkin trade offers while they watch the 4:00pm games.

Here’s a hint: The bidding starts at a 1st and a 4th. That’s the floor. Now tell me what you got that’s better than that. Can you hold? I’ve got Chicago on the other line.

It's Probable I'm Questionable

So, NFL TV ratings are down?

Maybe you shouldn’t have suspended pigskin heartthrob Tom Brady for four games.

The only man doing worse with white, college-educated women than Roger Goodell right now is Donald Trump. Those women are not voting for Trump and they all wish they were Gisele Bundchen.

And so do their husbands.

I’ll be here all week.

Bank

With that third win in the bank, Sunday morning is all coffee and donuts. A beautiful autumn day. I’ll treat the wife to a movie and dinner and try not to get caught checking the scoreboard on my phone. The only chance the Bills have is a debilitating case of jet lag for the Cardinals. The Dolphins should take care of business playing at home against the hapless Browns. Let’s face it, all I really care about are Manish Mehta’s first place New York Jets. Can the Chiefs stop the Jets in Arrowhead? Yeah, I’m not counting on that.