Wednesday, August 17, 2011

The Ocho

Reputation is a funny thing.  Like getting “Stinky” as a nickname in middle school.   You better hope your parents can afford out of state tuition.  Things like that stick.



Chad Ochocinco (Chad Eightfive for the kids attending public school) came to the Patriots with a reputation he earned by living his life like every day was open mic night at the local comedy club. For those of us who were not playing for the Cincinnati Bengals circa 2001-2010, it’s easy to judge. Think of it this way: Chad Johnson could have just as easily changed his name to Chad Fourandtwelve as Chad Ochocinco.

Wide Receiver is the diva class in the NFL but it never seemed fair to lump Ocho in with Terrell Owens, Braylon Edwards, Randy Moss, Plaxico Burress, Brandon Marshall, Dez Bryant and well, yeah, it’s a long list. Ocho has never thrown his quarterback under the bus, fathered illegitimate children, been picked up for DUI, ran over a cop, shot himself in the leg or punched out his girlfriend. More importantly, he wasn’t late for meetings, practiced hard and played the games like it meant something.

Apropos of Almost Nothing
If you’ve never seen the movie Diva, put it in your Netflix queue.  Or don’t, if you hate subtitles.

Full Disclosure
As a fan, Ochocinco’s antics mean nothing to me if he contributes on offense.  If the Patriots hadn’t traded for Ocho and instead had signed Braylon Edwards I would have swallowed hard and rationalized it somehow.  Given that context, it’s easy for your humble correspondent to embrace Ochocinco with open arms.

Many fellow Patriots fans clamored for the return of Randy Moss, preferring to ignore the 14-2-0 regular season record and blame the crushing playoff loss to the Jets on the lack of a deep threat.  Whatever.  (I’m looking at you, Defense.)  Clearly, Chad Ochocinco is not Randy Moss; Randy Moss is sui generis.  Or was.  The real question for Chad Ochocinco is, “How long ago was 2009?”  In the 2009 season Ocho had 72 receptions for 1,047 yards and 9 TD; essentially his career average for receptions and yards.  Of course, two years is a long time in the NFL.

Random Numbers
Given the multiple options in the Patriots’ offense and the additional wear on Ocho’s wheels, I’d expect a best case scenario of 55/800/6 in 2011.  In projecting Ochocinco’s numbers, it’s important to consider this:  2010 was the first year (excluding the injury-shortened 2008 season) since 2004 that Brady authored fewer than 500 pass attempts.  There’s been a lot of talk since the draft – with the addition of running backs Shane Vereen and Stevan Ridley – that the Patriots would return to the balanced attack of the Super Bowl years.  Could Brady throw even fewer passes in 2011 than he did in 2010?

One man’s humble opinion: No. 

Brady is still the Patriots best player.  Why take the ball out of his hands?  Why pay Ochocinco if there weren’t plans to continue throwing the ball?  Drafting Vereen and Ridley has more to do with long-term plans than 2011.  BenJarvus Green-Ellis is in his prime, coming off a 1,000-yard season but it’s not a bad idea to think about the depth chart for running back with Danny Woodhead essentially a 3rd Down back, Sammy Morris in his 12th year and Kevin Faulk in his 13th, coming off knee surgery. 

Does 550 attempts and a 70% completion rate for Brady sound outlandish?  That would generate an additional 60 completions over his 2010 numbers.  Would 50+ catches for Wes Welker, Deion Branch, Ocho, Aaron Hernandez and Rob Gronkowski surprise anyone?

I Know a Guy Who Knows a Guy
So, Dan Pompei knows a guy who knows things about Bill Belichick and that guy says Belichick will cut Ocho and/or Albert Haynesworth before the season starts to “send a message” to his team.

When exactly did Bill Belichick turn into Marvin Lewis?  Belichick cut Lawyer Milloy.  He traded Drew Bledsoe, Richard Seymour and Mike Vrabel.  He cut Randy Moss four weeks into the season.  Bill Belichick is widely regarded as one of the least sentimental men on the planet (I think he comes in at number 4, behind Vladimir Putin, Mitch McConnell and Bashar al-Assad).

Most other members of the mainstream media have called shenanigans on Dan Pompei.  While I agree wholeheartedly, I’m still curious as to why Dan Pompei would run with this and who this mysterious “NFL executive familiar with the Patriots ways” is.  Perhaps Pompei is simply chumming the internet.  I’ve heard more about him in the last few days than I have in years.  He didn’t break into the Top 20 on Google Trends (the Zac Brown Band?  Really?) but I’ve certainly heard more about in the last three days than I have in the last three years.  The irony of the internet is that you can become relevant by being irrelevant.

As for the unnamed NFL executive, I suppose we’ll never know their identity.  Just as well.  Seems like kind of a douche canoe.

Apologies
If you followed the Zac Brown Band and it made you want to punch a nun, have a little Linkin Park instead.


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