Wes Welker's Boyfriends

If there was one player who could fix what ails the Patriots, it wouldn’t be Wes Welker. I’m not sure any single player would be enough but don’t worry, I’m almost done with the time machine; I’ll be right back with in their primes Jim Brown, Deacon Jones, John Hannah and Jerry Rice.

That should do it.

It's Only Week 2

It’s only week two. Every team is going to lose at least a couple of games (except under the rarest of circumstances). Big deal, right? Except when they’re the first two games of the season. Starting the year 0-2-0 is a statistical death sentence. Which is certainly not as bad as an actual death sentence.

Your team missing the playoffs is still an undeniable bummer.

Upright and Locked

I’ve got a bad feeling about this one.

Broken Bones

It looks like we’ll have to put the Shane Vereen era on hold for a few weeks.  Does this mean Shane Vereen is fragile, too?

It Counts as a W

As they lined up for what would be the winning field goal, I couldn’t help thinking, ‘They’ve got a new holder.’ After everything that had gone wrong, after all the mistakes that had already been made, missing a 35-yard game-winning field goal attempt just seemed to write itself.

Then it didn’t and Tom Brady had led the 36^th fourth quarter comeback of his HOF career.

Viva Las Vegas

I get it if you don’t have any sympathy for me on this. I’m rooting for the Patriots, after all. With Brady under center, there’s a nearly four in five chance New England will take the W. And the Patriots have nine straight openers. The last time they lost a Week 1 game? 2003. In Buffalo.

Hurt

Jim Harbaugh made the classic mistake generally associated with lawyers: Never ask a question unless you know you’re going to get the answer you want. Harbaugh probably should’ve shrugged off Clay Matthews’ chirping. Defensive players like to hit quarterbacks. Whether they’re dropping back, rolling out or running the read-option, defensive players will try their best to hit the quarterback. So, Clay Matthews said out loud what anyone who’s seen the read-option knows; you’ve got to put a hat on that QB. Jim Harbaugh harrumphed and The League responded; if a quarterback is running the football, they’ll be treated like running backs, not like quarterbacks standing in the pocket where they have little chance to protect themselves from shots to the knees or head.