The Enemy of My Enemy

The Bye Week is bad karma for fans. Without our home boys to root for we have little choice but to root against our division rivals. That’s purely negative energy, dude. (Can I call you “dude?”) It’s the dark side of The Force, Luke. Granted, I root for the Patriots and anyone who’s playing the Jets, Dolphins or Bills every week but over the bye there’s no positive energy from rooting for my pigskin heroes to offset the negative. Perhaps I can dull the effect with vodka.

It’s worth a try.

Turning the Corner

The Patriots had but one significant weakness. On offense they can pass or run. On defense, they were stopping the run. Their Achilles heel? The 50-yard TD pass. So, they decided to do something about it, trading for Aqib Talib. Talib comes with a first round pedigree, anger management issues and a four-game suspension for Adderall. I’m totally psyched.

Something had to be done in the defensive secondary. Picking up a 26-year old with lock-down skills qualifies as more than something. A player like Talib could stabilize the Pats back four. It could allow them to keep Devin McCourty at safety where I think he has pro bowl potential. More likely we get McCourty at corner assuming Patrick Chung and Steve Gregory return to the lineup. Alfonzo Dennard as the nickel. I’d be good with that. I think it would definitely lead to fewer 50-yard TD passes.

And what if Talib is simply a good kid who made some bad choices and just needs a second chance? Would Belichick’s good friend Greg Schiano send him a certifiable head case loser lunatic? That doesn’t seem possible, does it? I’m definitely all up on that good kid theory. What better place to turn things around than with the Patriots and their “Patriots Way” culture?

And maybe punch ups with cabbies and pharmaceutical meth were just a passing phase. Have you thought of that? I mean, who hasn’t killed a hobo?

Am I right?

Tragedy and Farce

We saw “Argo” last Saturday. It was terrific. You should definitely go see it. What does “Argo” have to do with football? Well, it’s about teamwork, in game adjustments. It’s about stepping up when all looks lost. And Ben Affleck was like the Tom Brady of that movie. Omaha! Hut-hut!

Pip Pip Cheerio

London is a long way to go to lose a football game. It’s an even longer flight back. It’s Einstein’s Law of Expectations. Time slows down as doom approaches.

Anhedonia

Apparently, there are worse things than losing. Winning so badly that Jim Nantz thinks you lost for one. Also, not being able to update your status on Foursquare because whatever, you know, what’s up with Foursquare, man?

Backpfeifengesicht

The nut punch games are the worst. You want to punch somebody but you're all doubled-over and blinded by pain. Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. It shakes your foundational belief in the tangible verities of this world. Why do bad things happen to good football fans? The Patriots have lost 3 games by a total of 4 points. Is that a good sign or a bad sign? I really hope it’s a good sign. It’s usually not a good sign when I think it’s a good sign. Anecdotally speaking. Yeah. You want to know who’s got a face that’s badly in need of a fist? Reality. Right in the nose.

Be Like Water

“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves. 

Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

-Bruce Lee