Friday, June 26, 2015

Deflategate Ennui

I've gotten to the point where I see the link, a link designed to make me click because it either elicits a knee-jerk reaction of outrage or sparks a glimmer of hope the NFL will finally awake from its fever dream of a world where the New York Jets are playing the New York Giants in the Super Bowl, but I just can't bring myself to move the cursor over it and click. Call it Deflategate ennui.

 

This one's a video so I wouldn't even have to exert the mental effort necessary to convert symbols into language and interpret its meaning and yet I still couldn't be bothered. Since the science has already proven the Patriots' game balls were inflated to 12.5 PSI, what difference do these text messages make? If they are actionable at all, they speak to the overinflated footballs Tom Brady complained about from the October game with the Jets. Did Ted Wells investigate those overinflated footballs? No. That might've proven the officials working that game conspired with the Jets to disadvantage Tom Brady and perhaps gave an advantage to gamblers who bet on the Jets to cover.

Why would the League want to investigate that?


So, when was Emmanuel Sanders elected Pope of Football, anyway? The only thing surprising about this one is that it doesn't involve a player from a team the Patriots beat in the playoffs.

It does remind me that I haven't spent enough time enjoying the Peyton Manning almost got traded to the Houston Texans story. It followed the classic arc of a "not a shred of truth to it" denial followed by an "okay but it was never serious" denial. Seriously, there are members of the Broncos brain trust who want to get onto the Brock Osweiler era sooner rather than later. Didn't we all see this coming when Denver fired John Fox and hired Gary Kubiak? Note: This is not a gloating dance. He's 39 years old, he's playing with a surgically repaired neck, he'll be a first ballot Hall of Famer and I won't argue with you if you hold a deeply held belief that he's better than Tom Brady. I won't argue with you because it would be like telling a small child there's no Santa Claus. It's the truth, sure, but it would be mean, too and probably make you cry.


I did read this one because I loved Fire Joe Morgan. I still miss it.


No, everyone is not at fault. Roger Goodell (FTG) is at fault. And Mike Kensil and John Harbaugh and Jim Irsay. And Ted Wells, who said he saw Goody Brady dancing with the devil. That's it. That's the list. Not everyone.


Yeah, I read this one, too. But don't bother. The author is from Boston so, you know, not to be trusted on this no matter how many "facts" and "numbers" and "science" he uses to bolster his argument that Roger Goodell (FTG) probably made one of those baking soda, vinegar and food coloring volcanoes as his science project. In college.

Okay, that's not in the article. It's just my deeply held belief.


Like I needed to read this. I mean, we all know the fix is in so Goodell (FTG) has to make it look like he's actually considering whatever evidence was presented in Brady's appeal before he calls the $5,000,000 Wells Report an investment in integrity and upholds the suspension. Or maybe I shouldn't be surprised that it will take this long. I'm going to say Goodell (FTG) test out with a 3rd grade reading level, 4th grade tops.

How much was putting cameras in goal line pylons going to cost?

GoPro wouldn't do that in exchange for putting their logo on the pylons?



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