Monday morning and the gridiron cognoscenti are busy talking themselves into their favorite "Has a Chance to Beat the Patriots" team. There's Team KC and Team Steelers. The Raiders minus Derek Carr have been filed in the "What Might Have Been" folder and cross-tabbed with "Wait Till Next Year." Oakland can still secure the #1 seed and still no love for Matt McGloin! (I know what you're thinking; you're thinking Matt McWho?)
Miami and Houston, well, thanks for the regular season narratives. They were fun. Enjoy that first round home game, Texans!
Meanwhile, while they're not busy talking up Kansas City and Pittsburgh, pigskin pundits and bobbleheads continue looking for that fatal flaw in the Patriots' Death Star design specs. It was initially thought Brady's suspension would dash New England's hopes for a first round bye; the #1 seed would be out of the question (and we all remember what happened the last time that happened because it was just last year). Then the semi-annual Gronkowski injury was going to slow them down, make them ordinary. Did I mention the defense was hardly considered championship caliber?
"Who have they played?" the gridiron cognoscenti demanded.
"The halt and the lame," came the answer. "Tomato cans."
So, you're saying there's a chance?
On the strength of recency bias alone, Pittsburgh and Kansas City look like they have the goods.
The Steelers have their version of the triplets in Ben Roethlisberger, Le'Veon Bell and Antonio Brown. Bell and Brown are Top 5 talents and Roethlisberger is a two-time Super Bowl winning QB. But even when Pittsburgh had a great defense, they weren't able to stop Tom Brady.
Kansas City isn't necessarily great at anything but they're very good at everything. (Well that's what I heard.) QB Alex Smith is underrated. Tyreek Hill is hella fast. Travis Kelce is everyone's new favorite fantasy TE. They have one of those championship caliber defenses we wish we had in New England.
Wait-What?
The Chiefs have the #24 ranked defense in total yards? Oh, but #5 in points allowed.
Hm.
Sounds familiar.
Kansas City's 11-4-0 record is certainly impressive coming out of the AFC West. Then again, there are those puzzling losses to the Osweiler era Texans (granted, a long time ago), the Buccaneers and the Titans (definitely not that long ago).
But the playoffs don't start today, do they?
The Patriots need to beat the Dolphins this Sunday or hope what's left of the Broncos injury depleted roster can beat the Raiders to secure the #1 seed. (New England could also host the AFC Championship game if Oakland loses in the Divisional round.) The Chiefs could jump from the #5 to the #2 spot if they can beat the Chargers and the Raiders lose. The Dolphins can move from #6 to #5 and a Wild Card round game in Houston instead of Pittsburgh if they beat the Patriots and the Chiefs treat the Chargers like the Texans, Buccaneers or Titans.
Any of those things could happen.
But if the playoffs did start today…
With the caveat that I've got my Patriots Goggles on…
Wild Card Round
Packers 51, Lions 17 - Because Aaron Rodgers.
Seattle 15, Giants 14 - Pete Carroll goes for two and the win. Richard Sherman approves.
Steelers 31, Dolphins 24 - But Ndamukong Suh puts Ben Roethlisberger in the league's concussion protocol.
Texans 17, Chiefs 16 - Andy Reid goes for two and the loss. The only good decisions are the ones that work.
Divisional Round
Falcons 41, Giants 16 - Odell Beckham, Jr. is ejected just before halftime with his second unsportsmanlike conduct penalty when he punches Eli Manning after Eli throws his third interception.
Packers 37, Cowboys 35 - Rodgers with the Hail Mary to Jordy Nelson as time expires.
Raiders 20, Steelers 17 - Cue that blurry clip of the Immaculate Reception! Khalil Mack puts Landry Jones in the league's concussion protocol and Mike Tomlin opts to go straight up Wild Cat with Le'Veon Bell. Oakland wins despite three Matt McGloin interceptions thanks to a Sebastian Janikowski field goal in OT.
Patriots 41, Texans 0 - Bill O'Brien has too much self-respect to kick a 4th quarter field goal just to avoid the shutout.
Conference Championships
Falcons 51, Packers 49 - Whoever gets the ball last kind of game.
Patriots 31, Raiders 16 - Tom Brady vs. Matt McGloin. Who you got?
Super Bowl 51
Patriots 56, Falcons 12 - A game that will be better known for that awkward moment when Roger Goodell has to hand the Lombardi Trophy to Robert Kraft than anything that actually happened on the field, even with Brady throwing 5 TD passes to 5 different receivers.
It could happen.
Go Pats!
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