Thursday, June 5, 2014

I Decline

It’s entropy baby. It’s an immutable law of science. You can’t control it and you can’t even hope to contain it. There comes a point in the journey where it’s all downhill and it isn’t always a gentle decline; sometimes it’s downright precipitous.

 
Pigskin mathematician Sam Monson got the local pigskin pundits and bobbleheads asking, “Who the hell is Sam Monson? Is it Monson or Munson? Monson? Seriously? Okay.” Also, Tom Brady will not be defined by your cold, soulless, black eyes doll’s eyes, possibly mass-murderers-in-a-dystopian-future-where-they-kill-their-creators computers.

Tom Brady is Young Odin. He’s Jonathan E. He won’t be constrained by your statistical theorems and complex algorithms. Tom Brady is the indefinable. He always has been. Tom Terrific was the 199th player picked in his draft year and he is the winningest QB in NFL history with a 77.5% winning percentage.

Last year was an aberration! Rookie wide receivers. Injuries up and down the roster. An historically bad performance in pass protection by the offensive line. Now those rookies are second-year players. The injuries have healed (mostly). They drafted three very large men to bolster the offensive line. This year will be different!

I’m paraphrasing here but I think that was the basic consensus from the townies. Even grumpy granddad Ron Borges came to Brady’s defense. Everyone agrees (if grudgingly) that not even a demigod like Brady is immune to the ravages of temporal physics but sorry, the defense looks like they could be crazy good and we believe Brady will exceed his career averages (for the reasons above). Besides, we’ve already booked our tickets to for Super Bowl XLIX.

MVP! MVP! MVP!



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