Sunday, June 19, 2016

The Brady Divination - Episode 3

Roger the Good stands unnoticed near the water at Short Sands Beach in New Hampshire. It’s early in the morning and there are only a few other people on the beach. He watches them as they busy themselves with their blankets, coolers and beach umbrellas. He turns back to the ocean and takes out his phone. “Have you seen him? I know he’s late! Why do you think Im checking? Yes, okay. Just be ready.” He puts his phone away and glances around, noticing the man approaching from the east. Despite the Red Sox cap pulled low over his face and the sunglasses, Roger the Good knows immediately that Tom Brady has finally arrived.


Sunday, June 12, 2016

The Brady Divination - Episode 2

A short day’s travel to the west of the Cape Complex, the self-styled Roger the Good is meeting with his senior advisors in a glass and steel tower in the heart of Gotham.


On one side of the rectangular lucite-topped mahogany table are Jeff Pash, Mike Kensil and Troy Vincent; on the other side of the table, Charles Koch, Rupert Murdoch and pizza mogul “Papa” John Schnatter are seated. Tablets are set up in front of each of them. There are pitchers of ice water and glasses at either end of the table. On a large monitor at the end of the table opposite Roger the Good, in split screen, Vladimir Putin and Justin Bieber attend by videoconference. All of the men seated at the table appear to be uncomfortable and subtly shift their weight in their high-backed leather chairs.


Monday, June 6, 2016

The Brady Divination - Episode 1

In the distance, atop a promontory overlooking a dark, churning ocean breaking over the rocky shore below, stands what appears to be a modern day castle, with thick stone walls topped with turrets surrounding an inner keep. It isn’t called a castle by its occupants or even those who make their lives writing and talking about them. It’s the alternatively referred to as the Cape Complex or the Brady Complex and it is always capitalized to signify its importance for this is the home of Thomas Edward Patrick Brady, Jr., his supermodel wife Gisele Bundchen and their impossibly beautiful children, Ben and Viv.


Sunday, May 29, 2016

The Business of Football

It’s May, there’s been just a couple of OTAs and the Ryan brothers are already talking trash. Will that make beating them with Jimmy Garoppolo at quarterback that much more enjoyable?

Hard to say. I already enjoy seeing the Patriots beat any team coached by Rex Ryan way too much as it is.

Monday, May 23, 2016

The Appearance of Mischief

So, on the same day the NFLPA and Tom Brady file their appeal in the Great Pigskin PSI Conspiracy Caper, the NFL gets outed for not caring as much about traumatic brain injuries as originally promised. Several million dollars less than originally promised. Depending on who’s doing the counting. Details are so boring. If you watch any police procedurals on TV, you know the appearance of mischief is the first sign of mischief. Of course the NFL wanted to control the concussion discussion! That’s clear from the millions of dollars they have spent and of course from their over-familiarity with the curriculum vitae of neuroscientists.


Sunday, May 22, 2016

Up For Grabs

It’s one thing for someone like me to say Deflategate was all about giving the rest of the league a four-game head start but should players like the Jets WR/Reality TV Star Eric Decker actually be saying that out loud?

Sunday, May 15, 2016

99 Problems But The Pitch Ain't One

Let’s face it. Whatever Donald J. Trump did once upon a time just doesn’t matter. Everyone knew he was a devious huckster, a free market opportunist, a carnival barker, a preening egotist, a lout, a reality TV celebrity who conflates financial success with intelligence. We knew all that before he road the down escalator to his anti-immigrant fueled announcement for the Republican nomination. We knew all that and still record numbers of Americans came out to vote for him in the primaries.


So, some story about Trump pretending to be a Trump spokesman/public relations flack named John Miller or John Barron (what, no John Smallberries?) is supposed to knock The Donald off his pins? Bitch, please.