As Pigskin Goes By

Yes, the fundamental things still do apply.

Defense. Special Teams. And another Nick Folk field goal.

No truth to the rumor the Patriots have petitioned the league to wear leather helmets with their throwback jerseys.

I'm hoping it's true that defense wins championships. It isn't always pretty but, you know, great personality. Good sense of humor, too. Yes, the margin of error for these New England Patriots is so thin as to be transparent; against a better team, Jake Bailey's on-going struggles punting the pointy ball might have proven to be fatal. But this was the Colts with Sam "I Was A Teenage Quarterback" Ehlinger making just his second NFL start. I suspect Ehlinger will not have Matthew Judon or Josh Uche on his Christmas card list this year.

The Patriots are now 5-4-0 with their bye week coming up so they can work on themselves. And they do need to work on themselves.

Looking Back to Look Ahead

The math is saying there's a chance the Patriots make the playoffs. But what do biology and kinesiology say? They've been pretty quiet… 

Five by Five

Why not start with the obvious? The offensive line has been offensive; as in objectionable, displeasing, annoying, exasperating, vexing, unacceptable, or shitty (I'll let you choose your own synonym, gentle reader.) It will help to get David Andrews back from concussion protocol (also obvious, I'm good with obvious). Trent Brown at left tackle and Mike Onwenu at right guard have been solid but lately rookie Cole Strange has struggled at left guard, and the Marcus Cannon solution for right tackle is now on Injured Reserve, returning Isaiah Wynn to a prominent role on the O-Line and in Patriots fans' amygdalas. 

I don't know what the solution is but if I'm Bill Belichick I'm slipping into Dante Scarnecchia's DMs.

Stop Shooting Before You Run Out of Toes

I'm not saying that fixing the offensive line fixes everything else but it couldn't hurt. McCorkle is, after all, a pocket passer, so having a pocket to pass from is what some might describe as a prerequisite. (You can add that to your "obviously" stick count.) 

It would also help if the Patriots stopped hurting themselves on offense with unforced errors and uninspired play calling.

The best thing you could say about the Patriots offense is that it's been unpredictable. You never know when they might actually gain yards. (Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week. Try the veal. And don't forget to tip your waitress.)

What's that you say? Not unpredictable but the very definition of predictable, you say? You think it's better to say, inconsistent?

Potato. Tomato. 

Every so often, the Patriots do something on offense that makes you think, Hey! That looked like professional football! Unfortunately, that hasn't happened often enough to sustain drives that end in a touchdown.

If I'm Matt Patricia, I've got to go full Reverse Costanza on offense in the second half of this season, and do the exact opposite of whatever my first impulse is. 

Run up the middle on 1st down? 

Nope.

Find Jake Bailey a Life Coach

Or a hypnotist.

Given that they still call it football and there are only 32 job positions available with somewhere in the hundreds of job applicants for each job, you might think there would be 32 great punters in the NFL. And yet, there are not. Okay, so maybe it's a lot harder to punt a football than it looks like from my comfy chair and "great" may be equally hard to define, but whatever the applicable metrics you choose, the Patriots currently have the worst punter in the NFL.

Still, I'm hesitant to argue for cutting/replacing Bailey. He also handles kickoffs (meh) but more importantly, he's the holder for Nick Folk, an operation I would prefer not to screw with as Folk is currently second in scoring, having accounted for 77 of New England's 203 total points.

Okay. I just realized I'm arguing for keeping the worst punter in the league because he's the holder for FGA and XPA. 

My bad.

Let us never speak of this again.

Replace Jake Bailey

Fixed.

Defend the Wall

They've played the last two weeks without defensive lineman Christian Barmore, just got safety Kyle Duggar back from injury, safety Jabril Peppers is rounding into Rodney Harrison 2.0 form, and rookie corner Jack Jones has flashed as a playmaker. The Patriots defense has been playing well but could continue to get better as the season progresses. 

It's kind of what Bill Belichick's teams do. 

Get Healthy

It's what the Bye Week is for.

I told you the obvious was my forte. 

Go Pats!