QB QB Dooo

The Dallas Cowboys filled a dump truck with cash and backed it up to Tony Romo’s front door. I know $108,000,000 may seem like a lot of money but don’t you think he would’ve gotten more if he’d hit free agency from the Arizona Cardinals or how about the Minnesota Vikings? Besides, when Aaron Rodgers signs his big extension Romo’s deal will look like more than fair market value.

Perhaps the more hilarious QB-related news this week was Kevin Kolb signing with the Buffalo Bills. Okay, it would’ve been a whole lot funnier if he’d signed with the Jets. Kolb’s signing is a clear indication the Bills are going to be drafting their QB of the Future in this year’s draft.

Let me just add, and I’m not trying to be mean, but if you think Kevin Kolb is going to suddenly morph into Jim Kelly 2.0 then I strongly suggest you think twice before engaging in unprotected thoughts again. Seriously, put a condom on your brain next time.

This is the tragic-comedy of being a Buffalo Bills’ fan. You’re going to miss Ryan Fitzpatrick.

Let’s hope not. Even I can’t hope that happens.

Matt Flynn has been given a second, second chance, traded from holding Russell Wilson’s water to the starting QB gig for the Silver and Black.

Wait-What? His second chance is QB for a Raiders team that seems to have not even an echo of the memory of Marcus Allen and Snake Stabler and John Madden. It only makes sense. It was well known Al Davis, Jr. had the longest and most heavily litigated contract ever signed with Gozer the Destructor. Oakland will be a wasteland for a decade or more. Matt Flynn will be the scapegoat.

Not so Carson Palmer. I don’t understand the hate. One pigskin pundit opined that Palmer had now “quit” on two teams. Well, if it’s okay for a player to use his leverage to get the money he wants (like Romo in Dallas), why isn’t it okay for a player to use his leverage to get the playing situation he wants? Palmer will be throwing bombs to Larry Fitzgerald in Arizona and he’ll get $8,000,000 to do it. Less than the $10,000,000 Oakland wanted to pay him. But Oakland doesn’t have Larry Fitzgerald. They don’t have much of anything. Well, Matt Flynn, of course. Carson Palmer will enjoy throwing the ball to Larry Fitzgerald. He will throw the ball to Larry Fitzgerald a lot. He will throw it short, he will throw it long. He will throw it all day long.

I do like green eggs and ham.

Meanwhile, the luckiest boy in the NFL may be Colt McCoy, who was traded from the Cleveland Browns (yes, the Cleveland Browns) to the San Francisco 49ers (early fave for the Lombardi Trophy in 2014). McCoy will maybe backup Colin Kaepernick. Meanwhile, we’ve got the beginning of a QB controversy in Cleveland as new signee and itinerant QB Jason Campbell was signed to push Brandon Weeden.

If a QB controversy happens in Cleveland, does it make a sound?