The Brady Divination - Episode 1

In the distance, atop a promontory overlooking a dark, churning ocean breaking over the rocky shore below, stands what appears to be a modern day castle, with thick stone walls topped with turrets surrounding an inner keep. It isn’t called a castle by its occupants or even those who make their lives writing and talking about them. It’s the alternatively referred to as the Cape Complex or the Brady Complex and it is always capitalized to signify its importance for this is the home of Thomas Edward Patrick Brady, Jr., his supermodel wife Gisele Bundchen and their impossibly beautiful children, Ben and Viv.

The Business of Football

It’s May, there’s been just a couple of OTAs and the Ryan brothers are already talking trash. Will that make beating them with Jimmy Garoppolo at quarterback that much more enjoyable?

Hard to say. I already enjoy seeing the Patriots beat any team coached by Rex Ryan way too much as it is.

The Appearance of Mischief

So, on the same day the NFLPA and Tom Brady file their appeal in the Great Pigskin PSI Conspiracy Caper, the NFL gets outed for not caring as much about traumatic brain injuries as originally promised. Several million dollars less than originally promised. Depending on who’s doing the counting. Details are so boring. If you watch any police procedurals on TV, you know the appearance of mischief is the first sign of mischief. Of course the NFL wanted to control the concussion discussion! That’s clear from the millions of dollars they have spent and of course from their over-familiarity with the curriculum vitae of neuroscientists.

Up For Grabs

It’s one thing for someone like me to say Deflategate was all about giving the rest of the league a four-game head start but should players like the Jets WR/Reality TV Star Eric Decker actually be saying that out loud?

99 Problems But The Pitch Ain't One

Let’s face it. Whatever Donald J. Trump did once upon a time just doesn’t matter. Everyone knew he was a devious huckster, a free market opportunist, a carnival barker, a preening egotist, a lout, a reality TV celebrity who conflates financial success with intelligence. We knew all that before he road the down escalator to his anti-immigrant fueled announcement for the Republican nomination. We knew all that and still record numbers of Americans came out to vote for him in the primaries.

So, some story about Trump pretending to be a Trump spokesman/public relations flack named John Miller or John Barron (what, no John Smallberries?) is supposed to knock The Donald off his pins? Bitch, please.

Rational Rationalizations

Let’s face it, when we’re tracking the 90th spot on the roster, we really have to ask ourselves if we’ve got our lives’ priorities in order.

My answer: What? Are you kidding? Of course I do!

And welcome back to the Hawaiian Hammer, Joey Iosefa!

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It's Gronk's world and we're just living in it.