I spent my Tuesday basking in the heat and occasional light of hot takes following New England's MNF win in Buffalo, as pigskin pundits and bobbleheads tried to come to grips with what had happened Monday night in Buffalo. The Patriots had run the ball, run the ball, and then run the ball some more, ultimately winning a football game played in a wind tunnel called Highmark Stadium by the score of 14-10. They threw the football exactly 3 times.
What did it all mean?
Nothing?
My favorite trope from the gridiron cognoscenti was the trip to the alternate pigskin universe in which the Patriots lost to the Bills, a scenario where Buffalo scores a touchdown on their last possession instead of failing on 4th and 14.
If this happened, or that happened, or the other thing didn't happen, then we'd be having a totally different conversation right now.
Of course you would! Kind of obvious, though, don't you think? I mean, how much do they pay you for that kind of "insight?" More importantly, are you just trying to distract me from seeing that you have no idea what actually did happen so you'd like to talk about what didn't happen?
This win by New England wasn't "dominant."
Some had called it dominant in the immediate aftermath. They were wrong. Recency bias. Heat of the moment. With time to reflect we can see things for what they really are. Sure, the Patriots physically dominated the Bills on the line of scrimmage but come on! The score was just 14-10 and what if Buffalo had scored on that last drive?
This game wasn't a "statement."
Yes, rather unusual to run the ball 32 times in a row, and 46 times total, but is that really a statement? Unless it's a statement about Mac Jones' noodly arm, of course. So what if the game was played in 40 mph winds with gusts up to 50 mph? You just can't trust Mac Jones' arm. What other conclusion could you possibly draw? Hm. I wonder what sort of non-statement would be made if the Pats go flying circus against the Colts and Mac Jones goes 30/35/315/3/0?
Yeah. You're thinking about it, aren't you? You know it could happen, don't you?
I also noted what I'm thinking of calling the Accomplishment Denial Recalibration Effect when it comes to New England's seven-game winning streak.
It turns out, playing a division rival - the preseason favorite of many to represent the AFC in Super Bowl LVI - on the road, in a tornado, and coming home with the win wasn't as big a deal as we all thought it was before the game was played.
This may sound familiar. Because it is. We've heard the same thing about the Chargers game, the Browns game, and the Titans game; games that were thought to be "signature wins'' but it turned out they weren't.
The Patriots beat the Chargers because Bill Belichick owns a condo in Justin Herbert's head.
The Patriots beat the Browns because the Browns were down to one healthy running back and Baker Mayfield is playing with injuries to every major muscle group in his body.
The Patriots beat the Titans because the Titans didn't have any of their season-starting skill position players available, including the best running back in the NFL, Derrick Henry.
The Patriots beat the Bills because it was windy and because the Bills are tragic.
Let's see what the Patriots do after the bye, on the road, against a very good Colts team that's fighting for their playoff lives. Now that would be a signature win!
And then let's see what the Patriots do in their rematch with a pissed off Bills team.
Until then, would everyone please return to pumping your brakes on a Patriots Super Bowl run?
Thank you.
It turns out, this game wasn't even about the Patriots, Bill Belichick's pigskin brain, or Mac Jones' lack of biceps. This game was about the Bills and what the Bills did and didn't do. What is wrong with the Bills, anyway? They have a real, modern NFL quarterback, with a rocket launcher on his shoulder, who can also win with his legs. They have a true WR1 in Stefon Diggs. They have a very good defense. They played in the AFC Championship game last year, and then beat the Chiefs earlier this season, providing the bona fides for their status as Super Bowl favorites in 2021. Yeah. Let's talk about how disappointed everyone west of the Connecticut River is that the Bills didn't take care of business Monday night. Weren't they supposed to confirm that the Patriots' winning streak was mere luck and happenstance? Weren't they supposed to remind everyone there's a novus ordo seclorum in the NFL, one that does not include the New England Patriots or Bill Belichick or noodly armed, unathletic quarterbacks like Mac Jones? Weren't they supposed to start the Patriots' regression to their new mean as a perennial 3rd place finisher in the AFC East?
What the hell, people?
Was 2020 just a dream within a dream? Or perhaps a dream within a nightmare would be a better description. A dream that the Patriots are in pigskin purgatory. A perennial, just south of .500 team that wanders the middle of the first round of the draft, unable to crack the top 5 and secure that athletic, high upside, face of the franchise QB of the Future you've got to have to compete in the 21st century NFL. A dream where Buffalo and Miami would own the AFC East.
A dream wrapped in the nightmare reality of the Patriots as Super Bowl favorites. Again. For the next 10 years. You are what your record says you are and right now the Patriots are the first team to 9 wins in the AFC, they sit in first place in the AFC East, the #1 seed in the AFC playoff bracket.
Welcome to your pigskin nightmare.
That is, your pigskin reality.
No comments:
Post a Comment