They Will or They Won't but I Think They Will

I’ve been in a self-imposed media blackout for the last three days.  I’d like to say I’ve achieved some kind of Zen peace of mind; that I stand composed in the eye of the hurricane, shoulders back and chin up, ready for whatever may come. 

Seriously, I’d like to say that. 

I’d be lying, of course.

I’m vibrating in anticipation, vibrating so rapidly that I actually appear to be standing still.  Maybe I’m vibrating at a harmonic rate, like a guitar string.  I feel strange around other people.  Am I sweating?  Where are my hands? 

Why can’t I close my eyes?

I have learned that Tom Brady calls everyone “babe” and I think, ‘How did I not know this before and why do I know it now?’

After such knowledge, what forgiveness, am I right?

And when did Bill Belichick become Louis C.K.?

Tell me that isn’t freaking your shit out.

Meanwhile there isn’t a spare square millimeter on the Giants’ bandwagon.  Pigskin Pundits and Bobbleheads by the dozen are swinging bare-assed drunk from the railing of the Giants’ bandwagon with a bottle of Johnny Walker Black in one hand and an SI swimsuit model in the other.  The sound system is blasting Flo Rida and LMFAO.  Everyone is fist-pumping in unison.  They’re all wearing Eli Manning jerseys. 

The Giants even have the more heroic cancer survivor.  Seriously, everyone loves the Giants, Eli and Tom Coughlin.  Everyone is posting their obit for Tom Brady’s career.  Vegas is wondering why they installed New England as a 3 point favorite and starting to count their losses.

And still Bill Belichick is smiling.  Does he have something up the hacked off sleeve of his hoodie? 

I hope so.

Because these are my boys.  I’ll be devastated if they lose.  There’s no other choice.  I’ve got to believe.

I believe Dante Scarnecchia’s offensive line will win the line of scrimmage.  Light, Mankins, Connelly, Waters, Vollmer/Solder/Cannon are going to be fine.  The surprise in this game will be the Patriots running game with BenJarvus Green-Ellis and Danny Woodhead breaking off 5+ yards per rush.

I believe the Patriots’ defense will limit the Giants’ offense.  Vince Wilfork strip sack; Rob Ninkovich scoops it up for six.  Is it really that hard to picture that happening?  Perhaps unlikely hero Kyle Arrington with a Pick 6?

I believe the Patriots’ special teams will make a big play.  Edelman on a punt return or Slater with a forced fumble on coverage. 

I believe the veterans who joined the Patriots for their final hurrah will seize their long awaited opportunity for a ring.  Brian Waters, Shaun Ellis and Gerard Warren will play well and make plays.  If he dresses, I expect Ochocinco to make a catch.  In the movie theater of my mind, Ochocinco gets behind the Giants’ safeties and hauls in a big TD pass while music by John Williams swells in the background.

I believe Hernandez will show up big in yardage but Gronk will handle spiking the football.  2+ TD.

I believe Patriot for Life Kevin Faulk will go out in style.  3+ 3^rd down conversions.

I believe Wes Welker will remind everyone he’s the best slot receiver in the NFL.  Have you seen his mustache?

I believe that contrary to popular belief, Tom Brady is not dead.  Perhaps it’s a long shot but I still like the chances that Brady will have his career best Super Bowl, connect on 4+ TD passes and take home another MVP.

That’s what I believe…